Saturday, November 26, 2011

not another teen crisis

on thanksgiving,
i surprisingly had a grand meltdown. 

of all the days, right?

i was so very stressed for many reasons:

-since dyeing my hair blonde, it's so damaged that i can rarely wear it down.
-i have hardly been eating at all and gained about 7 lbs in the last 2 months
-my ipod fell and shattered 
-my car is still not working and i heard it could be super pricey to fix
-i'm living paycheck to paycheck and struggling to pay my bills {while living at home!}
-my third new phone in a month is not working
-bruno is going through a rebellious-teen puppy phase and chewing eeeeverything
-for some reason, i can NEVER{!} seem to remember to take redbox movies back
-i've been having heavy, pounding headaches daily
-adam started another job and i barely see the guy anymore
-my skin is starting to go all "before-picture" on me again

to top it off,
i seem to get sick all the time + my body is so sensitive to temps, foods, germs, etc. 

the list goes on,
and it's oh-so overwhelming sometimes. 
i can honestly say that, on paper, my life is in one of the lowest dips it's ever been.

adam came over for t-day 
and i completely acted out on him. 
so unfair!

i was crying and throwing myself onto my bed,
and possibly a pillow or two was thrown across my room {shh!},
but adam remained entirely calm. 

under some sort of odd love spell, he walked over to me, swept my messy hair out of my face,
and said,

"you're not a psycho.
you're partially-psycho for thinking poorly of yourself right now.
but you're a cute partially-psycho chick.
all of this is temporary."

he then proceeds to provide remedies to all my problems
and says that i'm lucky to have a body that is so sensitive and in-tune with the world. 
i just need to stay more protected.

i never thought of it that way. 

he left me alone to lay in my cocoon of blankets
so i could emerge a grateful butterfly
like i should have been at the start.

so my self-centered meltdown on the day of thanks
ended up being capsized 
and i learned me sum perspective.

i just needed a soft and patient yet large and nerdy black individual to calm my crisis.
he smelled good
and that's like sweet lovin' for my senses. 

i quite like this adam fella. 
i'm thinking of asking him to go steady with me. 
good idea, no?

1 comment:

  1. I tend to take things out on my boyfriend too :( But honestly - you're okay and you're going to be okay :)


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